Dear Serenity,
Congratulations baby girl. You are going to have a stepmother!
Seems as if Ricky proposed to Thelma, and I for one am very happy for them.
I hope that they have a lifetime of love and happiness and many many years of wedded bliss :)
Maybe now you'll get a younger brother or sister!
This Christmas started on Christmas Eve for you. We went to visit Nanu on Saturday. She's hoping that she can come back once a month and spend time with you. I guess since Ricky is not here, you will be spending that time with Nanu. You need to spend time with Ricky's side of the family too. That way you can see how much you are loved. After that we stayed the night at auntie Mommy and Daddy Martin's house and Christmas morning, we opened presents. You were so excited. It was great seeing how enthusiastic you were about the presents. And for the most part of the day you were very well behaved.
I hope that Ricky is not upset with me for not responding to any of his messages...well he sent about 4. But still. Mommy's phone was not charged since last night. I didn't have my car charger so when it died, I was in no rush to getting it charged up either. So for the first time ever, I went the majority of the day free of a cell phone. Kinda makes me feel out of the loop but at the same time it was so free. I was not constantly checking on facebook or texting...I was just spending time with the family. It was a joyous holiday, and I would not change anything in the world...I even got to see my cousins and aunt and uncle from France. They flew into town tonight and apparently all my aunts and uncles seem to think that I look like her. When I saw her, I just saw glasses that would cause them to think that way...but who knows.
Christmas and New Years was fun and exciting. You got a kitchen set, a vanity set, and a puzzle set. I was very excited about the kitchen set! I think I was more excited about than you were! But it's okay. You enjoy it and you get to play with it. I'm happy.
I just want you to know that I am doing my best to try and make everything okay for the both of us.
It's hard cause you and Daddy Moon are constantly fighting against each other. Not only that but I am the one that happens to be the bad person. Daddy Moon has his own way of disciplining you and I have my own way. Those disciplining ways are totally opposites. And now it's getting to the point where part of that is a burden on Daddy Moon and me. Is it your fault? Absolutely not. But there are times when I do wonder why you act the way you do when I am around. When I am not around, everyone tells me you are an angel. But when I am, you turn into this whiny, sass talking baby! (no pun intended). Maybe if I was not in such a debt crisis I wouldn't be working the hours I am working. Maybe if Ricky helped and sent money to help with you it would be less stressful on me. But the debt has been incurred and Ricky is not capable of helping yet. So what can I do? I'm at a loss for what to do and what not to do. I have cut back on spending...and I have been frugal to the point that I am comfortable with. Do I need to be come even more frugal and to the extreme? On top of all the debt that I have I am helping Grandma and Grandpa with some of the house bills too. So what can I do? I'm at a loss and I don't know what to do.
There is one thing I want you to know. No matter the reason of why Mommy is stressed out. It will never change the fact that I love you with all of my heart. And I hope as you grow up you will start to understand that when you do something wrong or disrespectful and uncalled for, there are consequences. Whether its sitting in the time out corner or even a good spanking. If you are bad, you will be disciplined. I know that I stick up for you often, but what everyone fails to realize is that when the time comes, I do discipline you. It's a shame that just because I don't do it at the time they expect for me to do it...does not mean it's not done.
You are currently slumbering next to me. Ricky was supposed to text me this evening so that you can skype. That never happened cause I never got a text. I'm sure we'll squeeze in some skype time with Ricky some time this week. I know you miss you and he misses you. Everything happens for a reason.
Forever and always loving you,
Mommy
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